I reached out to someone very close to me last week. I decided it was the perfect time to share my heart, to be vulnerable. Turns out that the response I received was “Really ??? Bold Move”. I was floored because it seemed an odd response to a very self aware letter about myself and recent discoveries I have made about myself. If I am honest, I did not get the response I wanted or expected. Jack always tells me that is why I get so upset. That happens to me more than the average person I am certain and many times I do not get a response at all which hurts in a different way. I expected compassion and maybe a little grace, something I would offer if I had received a similar email. I researched “bold move” just to make sure I was certain what the person meant. In case you are uncertain, it means “courageous, confident, and fearless; ready to take risks, showing or requiring courage.” After getting over the shame of reaching out in the first place and rereading the email, I realized that dadgummit it was a bold move on my part, but not in the way the person was referring to “bold move”. I am a very private person to a point, but then I realize to genuinely connect with others, vulnerability and openness are essential. I have mistaken certain people in my past for being trustworthy, meaning trustworthy enough to get a glimpse into my heart and soul and they have not treated me with kindness. Sometimes I forget those lessons and try again. My email attempt the other day was one of those times, a second chance, a reaching out to connect, knowing better and trying anyway sort of situation. I realized it was truly a bold move on my part. To be completely honest, most every thing I attempt these days, almost two years after brain surgery, is a bold move—driving to the store, walking in my hilly neighborhood, putting on shoes to go outside to do yard work, sitting at my computer to write something that only matters to me, agreeing to be in a photo, looking at myself in the mirror, even hiring a wedding planner for our daughter’s wedding when I am 100 % capable of decorating and designing a lovely evening on my own. Nothing I do these days is done without much thought, effort, or heart. So yes, I made a bold move to try to explain things to someone I thought might care. I make bold moves each and every day, and I am proud of most of them. Sorry, but what was meant to sting or cut me down to size like it always has doesn’t have the same affect as it has for most of my life. I make bold moves on purpose these days, and I am quite thankful I have what it takes to make them. Rebounding after a major health situation has a way of changing a person. I have changed for the better. I know who I am, and I know I deserve at least some respect and unless people are going to show me a tad bit of empathy, compassion or grace, and appreciation and acknowledgment of my bold moves that take guts, I really have no room in my life for them. And, that’s also one of my bold moves.